I love Steven Wright. I was in high school in the '80s, and there was a lot of stand up on television.

THING TO TRY: If you are asked to describe a suspect to a police sketch artist, describe in precise detail, the features of the police sketch artist. This is one of the rare instances where two people can do one self-portrait.

Canoe + waterfall = I don't go camping anymore.

I was a good student when I was a kid, and I did everything I was supposed to do, and I got A's.

A lot of people don't like bumper stickers. I don't mind bumper stickers. To me a bumper sticker is a shortcut. It's like a little sign that says 'Hey, let's never hang out.'

Don't talk to strangers. Sure, unless you want to meet anyone ever.

How many of you are creative? I don't know, but for me, when you make a bunch of things over time and then you keep them... you forget. I look through my sketchbooks and I'm an audience for myself.