My policy is 'No stone throwing regardless of housing situation.'

I think it's interesting that cologne rhymes with alone.

Whenever I'm on my computer, I don't type 'lol'. I type 'lqtm' - laugh quietly to myself. It's more honest.

When watering your plants, try to talk to them - say something like, Hold it right there and then shoot them with water gun.

I'm afraid of sharks - but only in a water situation.

I am a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a pita. Why the pita? That counts as another mystery.

I wasn't the class clown, but I was starting to become the "crazy guy" at law school, which is the guy who is not so much "crazy" as "annoying."