I like digital cameras, because they enable you to reminisce immediately.

I think it would be frustrating to be a match maker. "What do you do?" "I'm a match maker" "Aw, that's really romantic" "No, umm... I actually... never mind"

There is a small, but important, difference between peeing in the pool, and peeing into the pool.

It seems that two of the most basic forms of comedy are jokes and stories. And, of course, they are not mutually exclusive.

Your mind is like a sponge, in the sense that it would come in handy when cleaning off a countertop or something like that.

I was student council president in high school, and even in law school, I was vice-president of the student bar association.

If you want to make a mythical creature, just take a regular animal and add wings to it. A horse becomes a pegasus, a lion becomes a griffin, and a hawk... becomes a double hawk.