When I'm buying car insurance I ask myself, 'Which company has the most annoying and relentless commercials?'

It would be nice if people said, God bless you not just when you sneezed but also when you farted.

I think hair gel was invented to make it easier to identify assholes from a distance.

I wanna put stickers on turtles... I don't know why.

I want to make a revolving door that says 'Pull' on it, just see how obedient people are.

Some of them relate to farts but they are not fart jokes. They would just be a fart in the joke but it's about something else.

I remember when I used to be really into nostalgia.