Home computers are being called upon to perform many new functions, including the consumption of homework formerly eaten by the dog.

Life expectancy would grow by leaps and bounds if green vegetables smelled as good as bacon.

One nice thing about telling a clean joke is there's a good chance no one's heard it before.

Nostalgia is a file that removes the rough edges from the good old days.

Establishing goals is all right if you don't let them deprive you of interesting detours.

More marriages might survive if the partners realized that sometimes the better comes after the worse.

Spring is when you feel like whistling even with a shoe full of slush.