When being interviewed by a woman for a job, never begin with listen up doll face.

TV can be an acronym for television or transvestite. I prefer using it to describe the the latter. The former is strange and undignified.

Misery loves company which is ironic because it rarely throws dinner parties.

Please use anger for something positive like hurting people that deserve it or writing jokes.

What is sex addiction? I asked a doctor and the guys goes, Sex addiction... People will end up doing something they don't want to do just for sex. Isn't that called a first date, man? If sex was the result of something I wanted to do, there'd be condoms all over my PlayStation.

Perhaps depression is a perfectly natural reaction to the human condition.

Cities with a black middle class provide the narrow minded an opportunity to realize that cultural differences are largely economic.