Man's inhumanity toward man is astounding, and I'm just talking about the lineup at certain comedy clubs.
Being homeless is awful, but if you've ever tried to wrestle a duvet cover back onto a comforter you realise it's not without it's benefits.
You can tell a lot about a person by whether or not they're a transvestite.
If I ever move in with a woman, she'll have to be really comfortable with unhappiness.
Being proud of your nationality is like congratulating yourself for inheriting money.
The color red is associated with romance and blood, but not at the same time.