It's a shame that physical beauty often has such a negative effect on its occupant.
Anyone who says I would never hit a woman hasn't met my x girlfriend.
If I ever move in with a woman, she'll have to be really comfortable with unhappiness.
Comedy is rarely funny.
Whoever said life without love isn't worth living didn't own an iPhone. These things are great.
You know you've lived in LA to long when what you fear most about prison is a lack of organic produce.