If you're an adult and still think material wealth leads to happiness, might I suggest not being a moron.

I have emotional needs that I didn't know I had, and I have physical needs that I didn't know weren't really needs.

Being homeless is awful, but if you've ever tried to wrestle a duvet cover back onto a comforter you realise it's not without it's benefits.

Learn to think for yourself, unless of course you can identify someone else with better judgement, and a flashlight.

Maybe necrophiliacs are just people that want to have sex without a lot of talking.

If you carry a paperback book in your back pocket, but spend more time on your hair than you do reading it, you're probably a bad actor.

A picture is worth a thousand words, but conversations with them generally end in dissapointment.