Violence is never the answer, unless you don't feel like talking.
Is it a bad sign when the thought of your x-girlfriend makes you say things like, Satan is a myth... I guess.
Sex sells, unless you're dehydrated in which case you'd be much more likely to purchase water.
Mirrors at the gym only serve to remind me that I'm less of a man than I'd like to be.
Every time I see a happy couple I want to give them a polygraph.
The good things in life are free, except for health care, and electricity.