Money can't buy happiness, unless you're favorite hooker's name is 'Happiness'.
If no-eye contact sex were a sport, I'm not saying I'd make it to the Olympics, but I like my chances.
Next time I spank a girl during sex, I'll say, this is going to hurt me more than it will you.
Perhaps being hated in the right way is preferable to being loved in the wrong one.
Living by the beach means feeling guilty about never going to the beach.
Do you love me for me?... I don't even love me for me.