Health food would seem healthier if the people that sold it looked less unhealthy.

America is a hot chick with a bad personality. Take her seriously and you'll end up hating yourself.

I like Irish pubs, except for all the loud music and drinking, and people acting like idiots.

Whenever I'm around people it causes me to feel nostalgic for the loneliness that drove me into their presence in the first place.

Few things interest me more than the things people don't say.

You think you have anger issues? I just yelled at a sandwich. Not kidding.

Many television weather-women were one abusive parent away from prostitution.