Hard to explain to a guard dog that you need it to protect you from yourself.
I'd like to expand the definition of the word 'success' to include 'failure' as the one seems inseparable from the other.
I spend so much time alone that whenever I see my shadow I feel crowded.
Dating a white girl is like dating a black girl if she were really passive-agressive.
I consider myself a patriot, but not for the traditional reasons. I'm just really passionate about apple pie.
Do you ever have one of those weeks where you know nothings gonna go right?