I spend so much time alone that whenever I see my shadow I feel crowded.

Dating is great unless you don't like horrible awkwardness, lying, and a deep foreboding sense of disappointment that never goes away.

Domestic violence isn't funny, especially if you live together.

MTV has turned more young women into whores than poverty.

Is it a bad sign when someone asks you about the person your dating and a tear falls from your eye as you leap into oncoming traffic?

I hate to see a woman cry, unless of course I'm crying first in which case I feel it's appropriate.

America is a hot chick with a bad personality. Take her seriously and you'll end up hating yourself.