Violence is never the answer, unless you don't feel like talking.
MTV has turned more young women into whores than poverty.
Nothing good about the sun if you're trying to watch television with out curtains.
Money can't buy happiness, unless you're favorite hooker's name is 'Happiness'.
If you hug someone goodbye and their response is what the hell are you doing? - you may want to examine you're definition of close friend.
Statistically speaking, when a woman says I'm not going to have sex with you, she'll often have sex with you.