Finding your voice is something you have to keep working at. Your voice as a comic evolves the same way that you evolve. You have to find out what works for you. How can you express your opinion, your take on the situations in a way that feels natural to you? That's where you find your voice.

America has so much debt, if she were a person she'd need a co-signer to get a car loan.

Man's inhumanity toward man is astounding, and I'm just talking about the lineup at certain comedy clubs.

I've never understood why anybody makes a big deal about mansions. It's just a house with more rooms. You still have to face yourself.

If you hug someone goodbye and their response is what the hell are you doing? - you may want to examine you're definition of close friend.

Everybody's angry with me because, apparently, I outed my cousin during an argument over a turkey leg. My cousin goes, 'You had the last leg.' I was like, 'You're gay.

Water polo would be much more interesting if they hadn't gotten rid of the horses.