I've decided to retreat to the spirit world where I feel appreciated and understood.

Sex sells, but doesn't work so well as a strong-arm tactic. Give me your purse or I'll make out with you so hard.

Is it a bad sign when the thought of your x-girlfriend makes you say things like, Satan is a myth... I guess.

Most people that commit to a life of celibacy weren't leaving that much on the table in the first place.

Is it cynical to assume that anyone smiling is a liar and a criminal?

Please use anger for something positive like hurting people that deserve it or writing jokes.

Break ups are painful, but if initiated at the right time can fuel one's sense of optimism.