A picture is worth a thousand words, but conversations with them generally end in dissapointment.

Laughing at ones own attempt at humor while saying things just come to me should be punishable by death.

I like shitty strip clubs. They look like what they are. I know what to expect. Unlike Congress, at least we know everybody is for sale.

I have emotional needs that I didn't know I had, and I have physical needs that I didn't know weren't really needs.

If you spend a lot of time shopping for athletic clothes, you may want to consider spending less time thinking about high school.

Most public bathrooms now have automatic toilet sensors. People can't even be trusted to flush.

Health food would seem healthier if the people that sold it looked less unhealthy.