A picture is worth a thousand words, but conversations with them generally end in dissapointment.

Standup comedy is fun. I mean other than having to experience the excruciating lonlieness and unacknowledged sadness that results in funny.

You can't assume the best about people. If I get a girl home and she takes her pants off, and it looks like she's got herpes, I can't afford to assume she got stung by a pack of bees.

Is it a bad sign when you see the person you're dating and get the same feeling as if you just saw police lights in you're rear view mirror?

I find anger so comforting. It's like a blanket made of unresolved issues, but it's a blanket none the less.

Domestic violence isn't funny, especially if you live together.

America has so much debt, if she were a person she'd need a co-signer to get a car loan.