Maybe necrophiliacs are just people that want to have sex without a lot of talking.

I really appreciate the way you don't appreciate me, said my subconscious as I agreed to go out with her yet again.

I don't know about you, but I like to fall in love on Mondays. This way if things go south right away you still have the weekend.

I like to be able to connect with people. And that's how I connect, right away. I like to really talk to somebody. To me, it makes my night more interesting.

Money can't buy happiness, unless you're favorite hooker's name is 'Happiness'.

If only St. Valentine was around to see his memory celebrated through the mindless marketing of whipping cream and lingerie.

Dating is great unless you don't like horrible awkwardness, lying, and a deep foreboding sense of disappointment that never goes away.