It's a wonder you don't see the zebra being trotted out as a metaphor for racial harmony more often.

TV can be an acronym for television or transvestite. I prefer using it to describe the the latter. The former is strange and undignified.

My job as a comedian is to heighten awareness about locally grown produce, fight factory farming, and promote euthanasia, but in a funny way.

How can there not already be a rapper named 'O'pinion'?

I wish that every other guy were gay. Think about the leverage that would create in your relationship.

I would imagine that not having any potential could be less difficult than not fulfilling it.

Laughing at ones own attempt at humor while saying things just come to me should be punishable by death.