It may not be in the constitution, but every American has a god-given right to provinciality and ignorance.
Cheerleaders are simultaneously everything that is right and wrong with the world.
Horoscopes, like bad sitcoms, are created for people that I don't relate to.
Every time I see a happy couple I want to give them a polygraph.
At the gym; I've given up trying to get in really good shape, and re-committed myself to not getting any worse.
Space and time are figments of you're imagination, unless the guy you're flying next to won't shut up.