Being proud of your nationality is like congratulating yourself for inheriting money.
Nike store won't accept my Starbucks card as payment. Come on guys, just do it.
I have emotional needs that I didn't know I had, and I have physical needs that I didn't know weren't really needs.
You have the attention span of a large bug, and yet I don't feel good enough about myself to not date you.
Fear can be a great motivator, just not during foreplay.
Fountains are more romantic when you don't hate the person you're with.