Misery loves company which is ironic because it rarely throws dinner parties.

America has so much debt, if she were a person she'd need a co-signer to get a car loan.

The best thing about bugs is their lack of self consciousness, also the ability to fly doesn't hurt.

Can you spare some change? is never a good pick up line.

Cities with a black middle class provide the narrow minded an opportunity to realize that cultural differences are largely economic.

Statistically speaking, when a woman says I'm not going to have sex with you, she'll often have sex with you.

Perhaps being hated in the right way is preferable to being loved in the wrong one.