Fear can be a great motivator, just not during foreplay.

I've never understood why anybody makes a big deal about mansions. It's just a house with more rooms. You still have to face yourself.

How can there not already be a rapper named 'O'pinion'?

Health food would seem healthier if the people that sold it looked less unhealthy.

Statistically speaking, when a woman says I'm not going to have sex with you, she'll often have sex with you.

Suicide is like the ejector button in the cockpit of an F-15. If life goes into a permanent tail spin, it's nice to know the option is there.

Water polo would be much more interesting if they hadn't gotten rid of the horses.