Suicide is like the ejector button in the cockpit of an F-15. If life goes into a permanent tail spin, it's nice to know the option is there.

There must be 15 shows about people's jobs: 'Ice Road Trucker,' 'Axe Men,' 'Dirty Jobs.' Unemployment is so high, we're watching people work.

I like Irish pubs, except for all the loud music and drinking, and people acting like idiots.

Laughing at ones own attempt at humor while saying things just come to me should be punishable by death.

Suicide is like the ejector button in the cockpit of an F-15. If life goes into a permanent tail spin, it's nice to know the option is there.

Age is just a number, unless of course your trying to have a conversation with them.

Met someone who works at the zoo. Apparently the panda is a nasty animal.