People who say life is precious don't spend much time on line at the airport.
If procrastination were a marketable skill, I'd be a real hot commodity.
Next time I spank a girl during sex, I'll say, this is going to hurt me more than it will you.
Why hasn't anyone opened a night club named 'No Drugs Allowed, Wink, Wink'?
We're in this together usually means I'm here for you, unless it requires me getting into my car anywhere near rush hour.
Coming to terms with my feelings of worthlessness isn't always a bad time, but it's rarely a good one.