A high percentage of vegan men look like lesbians.

Break ups are painful, but if initiated at the right time can fuel one's sense of optimism.

Headphone aren't big enough these days. Why not just throw a couple of stereo speakers in a full face motorcycle helmet.

I've decided to aim a telescope at my neighbour's window. It's the closest I'll ever come to living with someone comfortably.

I'm endlessly amazed by what people are capable of, and incapable of.

Assassinating someone is another way of saying I care, just not in the way they'd want you to.

People that say I have a 'fear of commitment' don't understand my relationship with popcorn.