Mirrors at the gym only serve to remind me that I'm less of a man than I'd like to be.
Nothing good about the sun if you're trying to watch television with out curtains.
It's a wonder you don't see the zebra being trotted out as a metaphor for racial harmony more often.
If you hug someone goodbye and their response is what the hell are you doing? - you may want to examine you're definition of close friend.
Throwing up is natures way of saying you need to re-examine your idea of a good time.
You think you have anger issues? I just yelled at a sandwich. Not kidding.