Living one's life with unguarded vulnerability is one of the keys to happiness. It's also one of the keys to getting mugged.

We should create a holiday that celebrates money for what it is, essentially worthless paper, upon which we agree to pretend it has value.

America's objective in the Middle East is to create democracy in the same way that my goal on a first date to feed women.

Gay men greet each other just like straight guys do... If one of the straight guys saved the other one's life.

Perhaps depression is a perfectly natural reaction to the human condition.

Laughing at ones own attempt at humor while saying things just come to me should be punishable by death.

I would imagine that not having any potential could be less difficult than not fulfilling it.