Standup comedy is fun. I mean other than having to experience the excruciating lonlieness and unacknowledged sadness that results in funny.

Whenever I'm around people it causes me to feel nostalgic for the loneliness that drove me into their presence in the first place.

There are few places more lonely than a crowded night club.

Health food would seem healthier if the people that sold it looked less unhealthy.

America's objective in the Middle East is to create democracy in the same way that my goal on a first date to feed women.

Cities with a black middle class provide the narrow minded an opportunity to realize that cultural differences are largely economic.

Hard to explain to a guard dog that you need it to protect you from yourself.