It may not be in the constitution, but every American has a god-given right to provinciality and ignorance.

I would imagine that not having any potential could be less difficult than not fulfilling it.

Suicide is like the ejector button in the cockpit of an F-15. If life goes into a permanent tail spin, it's nice to know the option is there.

Met someone who works at the zoo. Apparently the panda is a nasty animal.

Horoscopes, like bad sitcoms, are created for people that I don't relate to.

I've decided to aim a telescope at my neighbour's window. It's the closest I'll ever come to living with someone comfortably.

You can tell a lot about a person by whether or not they're a transvestite.