When rappers call each other son it leads me to believe they don't take fatherhood very seriously.

If only you understood the way I felt... it wouldn't help much because I don't really like you as a person.

If space suits looked less like marshmallows, I'd be more interested in going to the moon.

Hard to explain to a guard dog that you need it to protect you from yourself.

A lot of people in a LA need to take a break from taking a break.

Everybody's angry with me because, apparently, I outed my cousin during an argument over a turkey leg. My cousin goes, 'You had the last leg.' I was like, 'You're gay.

The worst part about people with bad personalities is they don't know it.