Monogamy is god's way of making death seem like a more reasonable option.

I have a sneaking suspicion that leading an examined life and being really tan aren't consistent with one another.

The language of love may be universal, but it's not one of the options on an ATM machine.

Living one's life with unguarded vulnerability is one of the keys to happiness. It's also one of the keys to getting mugged.

When I was a kid I remember thinking, if I had a girl, I would treat her really well. Little did I know, they don't always like that.

Headphone aren't big enough these days. Why not just throw a couple of stereo speakers in a full face motorcycle helmet.

You forget how crazy people are in New York, all the people on the sidewalk. When you leave here, everyone's in their car. But I get back here - I just went to throw something in the garbage, and there was a guy in the garbage. And he wasn't looking in it; he is in it, looking out over 9th Ave like a fisherman.