I think that if anyone bothered to take a survey, they would find a sharp decline in atheism during the winters in Cleveland, Ohio.

Trust me, kids - your homework can wait. Don't need to be doing homework while Whose Line is on; skip it!

I don't miss the economic insecurity, the living paycheck to paycheck.

But I don't want to lose touch with things like eating in Bob's Big Boy.

TV is easier: it's all planned out for you, and the audience is there to see a show and they are all pumped up, but when you are in a comedy club, you have to be really funny to win them over. To me, that's more pure.

I learned how to believe in myself. Learned how to set goals, you know, self help books man. I just read every single one I can get a hold of, and I still do.

There is no such thing as too much fun. People need to know it is O.K. to tell jokes and be happy.