I wish I could end every rap song I didn't like with a buzzer.

I love the normalcy of Cleveland. There's regular people there.

Who ever thought that the world-famous Captain Obvious was really mild-mannered Colin Mochrie?

There's nothing like the energy in a small comedy club room or a small theater when it's going really well. I can see everybody's face practically in the whole room. There's no cameras in the way, and it's just me.

I used to go to the library all the time when I was kid. As a teenager, I got a book on how to write jokes at the library, and that, in turn, launched my comedy career.

I'd buy joke books and try doing them at school; I always had jokes. That would be my go-to thing at parties: I'd be able to get through them if I just told enough jokes. Otherwise, I wouldn't end up talking to anybody.

I'm down to earth; people sense that and they appreciate it.