I don't miss the economic insecurity, the living paycheck to paycheck.

I just try to get people to laugh - I'm not trying to change the world or anything.

I actually was worried about the pounding, but I actually love running more than working out on the elliptical. Now if I get on the elliptical, I feel like I'm trapped.

Like I said, all comedy is based on exaggeration, big or small, whatever you can get away with.

My cranky cardiologist says I'm destined to die in the kitchen.

The TV season is a year-long thing now, and the networks are starting to look at it that way, thanks to cable, satellites, and competition.

Why is everybody afraid of going to Heaven? You want to be here with the smog and the sin and bad people and the war? Or do you want to be in Heaven, sitting next to Jesus, you know?