If the fools do not control the world, it isn't because they are not in the majority.

Most of us are either too think to enjoy eating, or too fat to enjoy walking.

There must be some good in the cocktail party to account for its immense vogue among otherwise sane people.

The only way to amuse some people is to slip and fall on an icy pavement.

A woman does not spend all her time in buying things; she spends part of it in taking them back.

The greatest humiliation in life, is to work hard on something from which you expect great appreciation, and then fail to get it.

There is always a type of man who says he loves his fellow men, and expects to make a living at it.