When the sun comes up, I have morals again.

Ever notice that Soup for One is eight aisles away from Party Mix?

Real comedy can't be learned; it comes from a need for justice. The best who stand up, stand up for something.

I love being down at Occupy Wall Street. The sincerity, the youth involvement, the desire for better, is palpable and moving. There is true caring, sharing, and refreshingly naïve hope.

You never see a man walking down the street with a woman who has a little potbelly and a bald spot.

The message of great art is to disturb.

I've never been married, but I tell people I'm divorced so they won't think something is wrong with me.