For a single woman, preparing for company means wiping the lipstick off the milk carton.

Pigs are smarter than dogs, and both are smarter than Congress.

For a single woman, preparing for company means wiping the lipstick off the milk carton.

Here is what is needed for Occupy Wall Street to become a force for change: a clear, and clearly expressed, objective. Or two.

When I played the Sahara Hotel in Las Vegas on New Year's Eve, I got to bring Wiley, my 85-pound black lab. He's responsible for my favorite New Year's memory of all: At the end of the show, he ran onstage and then out across all the tables in the showroom, sending champagne glasses and gamblers flying.

I'm just a person trapped inside a woman's body.

Comedy is a blood sport. It flays the truth and spurts twisted logic. In America, people become comics because we don't have bullfighting.