What do hookers do on their nights off, type?
Men put all kinds of expectations on you. They want you to scream 'You're the best' while swearing you've never done this with anyone before.
I'd much rather see Richard Pryor or Jackie Mason in a theater than in a club.
My family was totally non-religious. There was no question we were Jewish, but we were not observant.
You know you're getting fat when you step on the dog's tail and he dies.
To listen to your own silence is the key to comedy.