Most people love animals, and most people love to laugh. Combining the two makes both resonate deeper.

The Vatican is against surrogate mothers. Good thing they didn't have that rule when Jesus was born.

Horse racing is waning in popularity.

Sometimes, if you really don't know how you feel about a topic, reading how both sides argue it can help.

Guys wake up at your place and they expect breakfast. They don't eat bagels and M&M's in the morning. They want things like toast. I say, 'I don't have these recipes.'

San Francisco is really fun and liberal, and it's my kind of politics. It's like being Jewish in front of Jewish people.

I am thankful the most important key in history was invented. It's not the key to your house, your car, your boat, your safety deposit box, your bike lock or your private community. It's the key to order, sanity, and peace of mind. The key is 'Delete.'