You know, if you need 100 rounds to kill a deer, maybe hunting isn't your sport.

The Vatican is against surrogate mothers. Good thing they didn't have that rule when Jesus was born.

Men put all kinds of expectations on you. They want you to scream 'You're the best' while swearing you've never done this with anyone before.

Comedy is a blood sport. It flays the truth and spurts twisted logic. In America, people become comics because we don't have bullfighting.

I'd much rather see Richard Pryor or Jackie Mason in a theater than in a club.

I am thankful that all the people in the world who absolutely, positively, know what God wants, usually kill mostly each other.

Wouldn't it be great if you could only get AIDS by giving money to television preachers?