I caught my wife in bed with another man and I was crushed. So I said, "Get off of me, you two!"

Sex is logically impossible after marriage. You have to overcome the paradox of Not this again, and Hey, where did you learn that?

I'm not as good a swimmer as I used to be - thanks to evolution.

Actually, my cd was released in 1985, in return for two German missionaries and a Dutch urologist.

My mother was like a sister to me, only we didn't have sex quite so often.

The subconscious is like having a laboratory assistant who pretends to love you and help you, but after you go home to go to sleep it goes back into the lab and starts fumbling with the data and destroying it. It's a very tricky thing. People think our minds are us, but that's not true at all. The mind is not us.

Now there's a seven-day waiting period to buy a gun. Who can stay mad that long?