When I was a kid, my goodness, corporate America was a bunch of stolid white guys in gray suits trying to be serious, and now it's stolid white guys in gray suits trying to be funny.

The other night, the president gave a speech. He said, "children are our most prescious natural resource". I thought, "let's hope it never comes to that".

You should get married. When I was younger, I was into the fame and fortune, and now I realize that a loving wife and happy children - that's life's greatest consolation prize.

I never cheated on my wife. I took seriously those vows of celibacy.

When I was a kid, I slept on rubber sheets, but now, I'm a man. And I can take the wetness!

England is better only because I stand out there as 'unusual'.

He taught me never to smile, which helps me when I visit disaster sites.