Libertarians believe consenting adults have the right to do whatever they choose, except band together.

A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing.

I asked my girlfriend, 'Will you marry me?' She said, 'We'll have to ask my father.' So we had a seance and Jack Ruby says, 'Hello!'

I don't know if I have sexual magnetism or animal magnetism, though sometimes I'll find a squirrel stuck to my forehead.

I love Florida. I love the beach. I love the sound of the crashing surfers against the rocks.

Santa Fe is fun to visit, but property there will cost you an arm and a dillo.

I love England. In fact, they're getting to know me so well at Heathrow Immigration that this time I was able to completely bypass the six months rabies quarantine.