I think the whole concept of monotheism is a gift from the gods.
I caught my wife in bed with another man and I was crushed. So I said, "Get off of me, you two!"
When deciding between two competing theories, always go with the one that doesn't involve a magic spell.
The only work I ever turned down was a cable programme called Diving for Excrement.
Now there's a seven-day waiting period to buy a gun. Who can stay mad that long?
My ex-girlfriend was very sexy. She reminded me of the Sphinx because she was very mysterious and eternal and solid...and her nose was shot off by French soldiers.