I once had a large gay following, but I ducked into an alleyway and lost him.

I was walking down the street the other day and these construction workers were working on the roof hammering away. One of them told me I was a paranoid lunatic... in morse code.

Lord please break the laws of the universe for my convenience. Amen.

I think of people as members of an audience. But an audience acts independently of every individual. It's an organism on its own. I focus on that living hydra in the dark.

In our school you were searched for guns and knifes on the way in and if you didn't have any, they gave you some.

At my lemonade stand I used to give the first glass away free and charge five dollars for the second glass. The refill contained the antidote.

A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing.