People always ask me, 'Where were you when Kennedy was shot?' Well, I don't have an alibi.
The other night, the president gave a speech. He said, "children are our most prescious natural resource". I thought, "let's hope it never comes to that".
I learned about sex the hard way... from books.
The only work I ever turned down was a cable programme called Diving for Excrement.
Ambiguity — the Devil's volleyball.
A friend of mine gave me a Philip Glass record. I listened to it for five hours before I realized it had a scratch on it.