People come up to me and say, 'Emo, do people really come up to you?'

Santa Fe is fun to visit, but property there will cost you an arm and a dillo.

Now there's a seven-day waiting period to buy a gun. Who can stay mad that long?

New York's such a wonderful city. Although I was at the library today. The guy was very rude. I said, "I'd like a card." He says, "You have to prove you're a citizen of New York." So I stabbed him.

You don't appreciate a lot of stuff in school until you get older. Little things like being spanked every day by a middle-aged woman: Stuff you pay good money for in later life.

When I was 10, I beat up the school bully. His arms were in casts. That's what gave me the courage.

My parents had very strict rules for me. Rules like, I couldn't be home until a certain hour.