I was walking home one night and a guy hammering on a roof called me a paranoid little weirdo. In morse code.

If you're worth over $50m you should have to dress like that guy on the Monopoly box. The super-rich shouldn't get all the benefits of looking like a regular guy.

My dad always said, If someone hands you a lemon, make lemonade. Plus that also works wonderfully as a metaphor.

I used to be scared of pretty girls, until one confessed they're just as scared of me.

Libertarians believe consenting adults have the right to do whatever they choose, except band together.

Anger punishes the bearer's heart. Who remains angry suffers most. For many, the search for perfection virtually guarantees it will be found, and disregarded in order to continue the search. Some mornings it just doesn't seem worth it to gnaw through the leather straps.

My parents were very protective. I couldn't even cross the street without them getting all excited, and placing bets.